„schhhhhhh“ The yellow and red almost brown leaves were rustling in the wind. It was a windy day, Camilla thought. The wind will soon have swept all of the leaves of its trees, letting them rot on the ground, until snow will fall and cover them with its white, cottony beauty. She could already smell the cent of snow, this crispy but also brisk cent of snow that covers Stockholm like a veil of cold but somehow comforting silk. Deeply inhaling mmmmhhhhhaaa – Camilla imagined that ingressive sound of the cold winter air running down her windpipe, entering her lungs with a stinging pain of thousands of small needles pricking her muscle flesh, taking her breath away, and for a millisecond letting her feel as alive as nothing else can do.
Camilla simply loves winter she has always loved winter. That time of the year where love, closeness and warmth is needed more than ever, that time of the year where you realize that family and feeling loved is the greatest good someone can possess. That cold and harsh weather that makes affection towards you feel like being wrapped in a cosy, all embracing blanket that is spending you comforting warmth, helping your organs run, she thought. She simply enjoyed those cold bright winter nights. Camilla could feel the corners of here mouth lifting up to a wholehearted smile, only by thinking of all the winters she was blessed to experience.
Camilla, what are you waiting for?
Harvey impatiently asked with his loud and scratchy voice letting Camilla startle, with here comforting thoughts deflagrating like hot damp – psshhh – bringing her back to reality. A reality she didn’t want to face; a reality she was not prepared to be confronted with, not yet. Looking up, Danderyd hospital, written in bold letters, was prevailing over her like a thread. Letting her feel smaller than she has ever felt before. Camilla knew that stepping through this slide door, she might never feel that comforting warmth of winter again.